Day 21

Another day I cannot believe it has been 21days part of me feels like we have been here for 6 months..Well I am going to be honest with you all I was having a ruff emotional day..I kept going back it to my room to pray and read, I just could not get it together…I heard three ladies talking outside they were just here to visit I walked straight pass them a couple times..When time can for Elliott to get dressed I went down to help..as I picked him up to put his diaper on the ladies started talking to me and asking me question I for some reason told one of them my story..I was not sure why since I really was not going to tell anyone…I left out names but one of them spoke up and said the organization that we went through with Ethan..I looked at in shock and started to cry..I don’t know where that came from I have not cried since coming to the baby house ..I guess the pain is still lingering around..Even though God has giving me strength and grace…well they were what I guess I need at the time .woman who have also fought for their children.. I do not know the full reason behind all of this but I know my God is at work and I am not questioning it..so Elliot was a cling on today I guess they said he refused to eat last night and wanted to be spoon feed then all morning he would not let go which is common for a lot of kids here but not Elliott…he wouldn’t leave me nor could any kid come near me..at lunch I took his shirt off and put him in side for lunch ..Thinking if I left he would stop crying and eat..10 minutes later one of the mommas called me down saying Elliott was refusing to eat..I then came down and sat by him and put is hand on the plate..He then eat his lunch..I have never sat by him during any meal so I don’t know what is in his mind..He now chosen us and there is no turning back..The ladies then asked me to sit with for every meal..which is not a problem I thought I was avoiding him throwing a fit by leaving..all I can say is we need a court date now…then I will move back with Rick and Sarah's ….